Last weekend, a friend and I walked in the Komen Race for the Cure in Grand Rapids. We crossed the starting line and began our walk up Wilson Avenue, and I was amazed at the sea of pink ahead of us. As far as the eye could see were people walking and running to support breast cancer awareness—nearly seven thousand of us!—men, women, and children in all different variations of the color pink. And it got me thinking…
Pink is not the color I would have chosen for my life. In fact, six years ago my wardrobe held only one item of pink clothing: a pink sweater my mom had given me for Christmas in
my freshman year of high school. I wore it through high school and into college before tucking it away in a drawer. Then came my cancer diagnosis in June 2004 and my world suddenly turned pink. For some reason I had kept that sweater all those years, and instantly it took on greater significance, almost as if my mom somehow knew I would need it one day. Now, some twenty years after I first unwrapped it, the sweater is a showing inevitable signs of age—kind of like myself! :-) But I still wear it during the cold winters, and each time I wear it is like getting a hug from Mom.
October is breast cancer awareness month, and few people are more aware of breast cancer than those of us who have walked the path of surgery, chemotherapy, radiation, and follow-up treatments that alter our lives forever. My body healed, my hair grew back, but my wardrobe is still chock full of the color pink: pink t-shirts and turtlenecks; pink sweatpants, sweatshirts, and tennis shoes; pink socks, purses, and pins; pink ball caps, bracelets, and bandannas. They are reminders of the miracle God worked (and continues to work) in my body and of how thankful I am for the gift of each day.
Once upon a time, I dreamed of picking out lots of pink stuff when God would bless us with a baby girl, a sister for Ben to complete the “American Dream” family: dad, mom, boy, girl, and a dog. The Lord had a different plan for my life, however, and baby girl pink wasn’t in it. I’m still waiting to discover all God’s plan involves, but for now I’m content to enjoy this season of being a mother to my absolute favorite son, watching him grow and learn. Life could have been so different for him and Sean if God had not chosen to heal me.
So my pink “fix” has come in a way I never would have chosen for myself, via physical pain and broken dreams. Looking back, though, I can honestly say I wouldn’t trade it for anything. The lessons I learned about compassion, patience, endurance, encouragement, and the giving and receiving of blessing have genuine Kingdom value. And never fear, I still wear plenty of pink stuff. Even as I type this, I’m wearing the hot pink survivor t-shirt from last weekend’s 5K walk.
Lately, however, I’m being more intentional about including other colors in my fashion and accessory choices. You see, while pink is a color of courage and hope to those of us who have journeyed through breast cancer, I am to the point six years later where I refuse to be defined by a disease. Yes, I survived breast cancer. That’s a big part of my life, but it’s only a part of my life. So I’ll mix things up with some other shades: peach, salmon, rose, magenta, fuchsia. Maybe even a bit of red, blue, and purple while I’m at it. Just not yellow…please, God, don’t make me wear yellow! :-)
Pink is not the color I would have chosen for my life. In fact, six years ago my wardrobe held only one item of pink clothing: a pink sweater my mom had given me for Christmas in
my freshman year of high school. I wore it through high school and into college before tucking it away in a drawer. Then came my cancer diagnosis in June 2004 and my world suddenly turned pink. For some reason I had kept that sweater all those years, and instantly it took on greater significance, almost as if my mom somehow knew I would need it one day. Now, some twenty years after I first unwrapped it, the sweater is a showing inevitable signs of age—kind of like myself! :-) But I still wear it during the cold winters, and each time I wear it is like getting a hug from Mom.October is breast cancer awareness month, and few people are more aware of breast cancer than those of us who have walked the path of surgery, chemotherapy, radiation, and follow-up treatments that alter our lives forever. My body healed, my hair grew back, but my wardrobe is still chock full of the color pink: pink t-shirts and turtlenecks; pink sweatpants, sweatshirts, and tennis shoes; pink socks, purses, and pins; pink ball caps, bracelets, and bandannas. They are reminders of the miracle God worked (and continues to work) in my body and of how thankful I am for the gift of each day.
Once upon a time, I dreamed of picking out lots of pink stuff when God would bless us with a baby girl, a sister for Ben to complete the “American Dream” family: dad, mom, boy, girl, and a dog. The Lord had a different plan for my life, however, and baby girl pink wasn’t in it. I’m still waiting to discover all God’s plan involves, but for now I’m content to enjoy this season of being a mother to my absolute favorite son, watching him grow and learn. Life could have been so different for him and Sean if God had not chosen to heal me.
So my pink “fix” has come in a way I never would have chosen for myself, via physical pain and broken dreams. Looking back, though, I can honestly say I wouldn’t trade it for anything. The lessons I learned about compassion, patience, endurance, encouragement, and the giving and receiving of blessing have genuine Kingdom value. And never fear, I still wear plenty of pink stuff. Even as I type this, I’m wearing the hot pink survivor t-shirt from last weekend’s 5K walk.
Lately, however, I’m being more intentional about including other colors in my fashion and accessory choices. You see, while pink is a color of courage and hope to those of us who have journeyed through breast cancer, I am to the point six years later where I refuse to be defined by a disease. Yes, I survived breast cancer. That’s a big part of my life, but it’s only a part of my life. So I’ll mix things up with some other shades: peach, salmon, rose, magenta, fuchsia. Maybe even a bit of red, blue, and purple while I’m at it. Just not yellow…please, God, don’t make me wear yellow! :-)
